SiDe EfFeCtS oF dRiNkInG
~Consumption of alcohol may make you think you are whispering when you are not.
~Consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing like an idiot.
~Consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell the same boring story over and over again until your friends want to SMASH YOUR HEAD IN.
~Consumption of alcohol may cause you to thay shings like thish.
~Consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe that ex-lovers are really dying for you to telephone them at 4 in the morning.
~Consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering what the hell happened to your pants.
~Consumption of alcohol may make you think you can logically converse with other members of the opposite sex without spitting.
~Consumption of alcohol may make you think you have mystical Kung Fu powers.
~Consumption of alcohol may cause you to roll over in the morning and see something really scary (whose species and or name you can't remember).
~Consumption of alcohol is the leading cause of inexplicable rug burns on the forehead.
~Consumption of alcohol may create the illusion that you are tougher, handsomer and smarter than some really, really big guy named Bubba.
~Consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe you are invisible.
~Consumption of alcohol may actually CAUSE pregnancy.
~Consumption of alcohol may lead you to think people are laughing WITH you.
~Consumption of alcohol may cause an influx in the time-space continuum, whereby small (and sometimes large) gaps of time may seem to literally disappear.
...to alcohol! The cause of, and the solution to all of life's problems.
-Homer Simpson

You know the feeling of one too many drinks: slurred speech, spinning room and lurching steps. When you consume alcohol, the body immediately begins breaking it down in the liver. In the process, break-down products called ethyl esters speed the movement of positively charged potassium ions from brain cells through the outer membranes, creating a negative charge within the cells. This impairs calcium channels. The brain and nerve cells rely on calcium to communicate with other cells throughout the body. When calcium concentrations decrease, so does cell communication, resulting in intoxication behavour: sluring speech, decreased cognitive ability, relaxed inhibitions, eventual death...